Everyone Gets Divorced

We know what you’re thinking. “Who are you to give advice?”  Or ,”What do you know?”  Well, one of the positive aspects of getting divorced, is that it’s an opportunity to learn from your mistakes. Where did it all go wrong? We’ve done extensive research and analysis and come up with these rules for a happy marriage. Read them. Study them. Live them.

1. Admit when you’re wrong.

A lot of people have trouble doing this. But once you get in the habit, it’s really easy, and it feels good. Try it. “I was wrong–the capital is Canberra, not Sydney.”  Or this.  “I was wrong to think you’d ever change.”  Simple!

2. Spend time together, but enjoy your time apart.

Having some alone time is crucial to a successful marriage.  Try maintaining separate residences. It worked wonders for Franklin and Eleanor Roosevelt.

Successfully married, in that she lived in a cottage, didn’t touch her husband, and never got divorced.

3. Don’t bring up mistakes of the past.

It’s tempting, but it gets you nowhere. It’s far more productive to make wild accusations about the future.

4. Never go to bed angry.

This is so important. You MUST stay angry and awake for as long as is humanly possible.  After a grueling 20 or 30 hours, one of you will probably fall asleep. And that settles it. That person is the loser.

5. At least once a day, compliment your partner.

It doesn’t have to be a different compliment every time. And there’s almost certainly one thing you like about your spouse.  Don’t take it for granted.  Tell them every single day.  “I really admire the shape of your head.”