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What Your Ex is Doing Right Now

No matter who you are, you’re going to find yourself wondering about your ex from time to time. You can’t help it. But we’re not all as lucky as Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. They can just pick up a copy of People magazine to see what their ex is up to. (They don’t even have to buy it!) But the rest of us are all left imagining. Speculating. Trying not to care but still sort of caring.
We can help. It so happens that we know EXACTLY what your ex is doing RIGHT NOW.

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Divorce…of the future

If you’re like us, you probably spend a lot of time thinking, “Sure, divorce is great now, but how different will it be 100 years from now?” Well, we have some ideas.  Here are our predictions about divorce of the future.

DIVORCE OF THE FUTURE

  • You will find out that your husband was having an affair with his robot secretary.
  • Your husband will claim that it’s not “really cheating”‘ if it’s with a robot.
  • You will find out that your wife was having an affair with her cyborg personal trainer.
  • When you move out, your appliances will decide for themselves who they’re going to live with.
  • You and your spouse will have your holograms do all your bickering.
  • You will drive your flying car to meet with your divorce attorney.
  • You will take the hovercraft to meet with your divorce attorney.
  • You will use a complicated system of moving sidewalks to walk to your divorce attorney.
  • After separating, you will have to get used to the fact that your wife is not cooking dinner for you. Fortunately, dinner is delivered to you by the push of a button.
  • Your robot butler will console you as you cry yourself to sleep.
Slut.

Slut.

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