After a breakup, you might experience something called “ex-blindness.” This is where you begin to believe that your ex-husband/wife was actually truly wonderful and that you miss them and want them back. You might even get really whiny about it and complain to your friends or strangers on Facebook. The problem is that you are not correctly remembering your ex at all. We are here to help you. We consulted science* and even a little math** to come up with a comprehensive list of ABSOLUTELY TRUE FACTS about ex-husbands and ex-wives.
*–we invented the science
**–we don’t believe in math
Everyone Gets Divorced 
My ONLY regret is NOT having left sooner!…. 28 FRIKKIN years of misery, sadness, depression, and for WHAT?????????
I especially like the one about 98% of husbands…at work.